Albert Icestein-Update

Sounds from the ticking clock could be heard faintly in the background. Each tick suggested the obvious that time was not standing still. The intensity to accomplish something flowed like unsettling anxiety that causes difficulty with falling asleep at night. The more you focus on sleep, the more you keep looking at the clock. You say that if you get to sleep now, you’ll get at least four hours of shut-eye before waking up for work in the morning. Another two hours pass when you look at the clock again, and sleep never happens. No matter what the issue is, one thing for sure is that time is a motivator.

The past is also a period that we all can learn from to better ourselves. More than likely, you might’ve felt pressed for time to get things done and pressured yourself to beat the clock. You might’ve even used it wisely to learn new things.

Writing blog posts has been quiet because I have been learning new things about writing and self-publishing. So far, I’ve participated in online courses like Accounting Fundamentals I and II, Keys To Effective Editing, Introduction to InDesign CC, and Write and Publish Your Non-Fiction Book. There will be a few more courses that I will study to build my skills and hopefully help others succeed with their writing and publishing goals.
Over the past years, writing and self-publishing have been subjects I’ve learned about since 2014, mainly through how-to videos on youtube. After learning all I could from such tutorials, I managed to write and self-publish my first book in 2020. My genre of choice is non-fiction, self-transformation, and family relationships. The first book published in 2020 did not do so well. There wasn’t any personal storytelling in it, and I had no idea how to market my book. Since sales weren’t that good, I discontinued the book even though I did sell a few here and there.

The morning sun illuminated the living room and suggested that it would be a great day. Not only did the clock’s ticking sound fill the room, but the humming sound of the running air conditioner also occupied the space. In that relaxed stillness, important decisions can happen with clarity. With the laptop open and your cursor hovering over the delete button, you click on it with ease and satisfaction. Once you click that button, you gain confidence that a new beginning is about to happen.

It was an incredible feeling to discontinue my book and start over. After I hit that delete button, I decided it was time for a personal update. The update included taking some courses as I reflected on my writing style. The truth was that when I first wrote my book, I was afraid to share personal stories. Plus, I sacrificed my artistic talent in storytelling. Yes, non-fiction authors must be able to craft their writing talent through storytelling. Unfortunately, I left that out of the first book because I tried too hard to make it sound like a term paper for college. In my younger years, I wrote in storytelling form while in college. So, why did I try too hard to make my first book sound like a term paper? Unless you’re a college teacher, you might’ve been impressed with it, but since college teachers were not my target audience, it wouldn’t appeal to the ideal reader I was writing for in my genre. I’m glad I discontinued my first book.

I am writing a book that will be part of an upcoming series. These books will focus on self-transformation after dealing with complex family issues that lead to disconnection and division. Emphasis will be on moving forward with your life after experiencing disconnection or when others choose not to communicate with you anymore. The series will motivate you to see yourself in a different and positive light. These books will cause you to laugh, cry and captivate you to the very end. I promise to share personal experiences with creative storytelling that you will enjoy and be delighted to read.

What did you update in your life recently that you started over? How has time played a part in your personal update? Please leave a comment because I enjoy learning about you and your journey.



The Dream

What wakes a man up from sleep at three in the morning to write a blog post? Was it a dream about him trying to reunite with his family that had abandoned him and condemned him to loneliness? What did he say in his dream that woke him up so early in the morning that he had to grab his laptop to create this post?

Usually during this time in December as the Christmas holiday approaches I’m haunted by the fact that my family had abandoned me. I try not to let it get me down although it does bother me and makes me quite sad. I even struggled with myself to write this entry as I feel conflicted with thoughts that many may not even care and that no one will bother to read it. Either way I’m fine.

With the recent tornado of December 2021 many people have lost their lives. Homes and businesses were destroyed and Covid-19 has claimed almost 800,000 lives. My dream that woke me up at three this morning was about my family issues but when I woke up the thought of death and destruction caused by the recent tornado and all the death caused by Covid-19 was on my mind and in my heart. The dream and the issues are connected and they are connected by one thing. Anyone that reads this will think automatically that the connection is hope. Then my question is what is hope and why does it exist?

Hope exists in the middle of chaos and grief and it’s a doorway for love. A doorway for unconditional love that is seriously forgiving. A kind of love that doesn’t expect anything in return nor expect anyone to change. It’s like a nurse in the intensive care unit of the hospital that is overwhelmed and overworked by covid patients. The nurse will still hold each patient’s hand while they take their last breath so they won’t feel alone as they pass. Such nurses demonstrate unconditional love even to patients that refuse to wear a mask or get vaccinated.

Unconditional love gives people hope in the middle of chaos. Strangers from all over the United States will travel to the areas that were destroyed by the tornado. These strangers filled with unconditional love look past skin color, gender, politics, and even religion. Unconditional love looks past everything negative and just sees the beauty in people.

In my dream I was trying to reach out to my mother and brother who haven’t talked to me in real life since 2014. I dreamt that I was surrounded by them and the pastor of their church whom I never met in real life. I asked my brother how many times did Jesus say to forgive someone and he answered seventy times seven. Then I said that’s true and then added that every time you forgive someone it gives the person you forgive a new clean slate every time. In the dream he walked away and my mother walked away too. I fell to my knees crying and then landed on my back. It hurt me that my mother and brother seem not to know about unconditional love. Then in the dream my mother and brother came back and he said that he forgave me. I tried to get up and their pastor helped me back to my feet. It was hope that woke me up at three this morning.